I was in an interview this week and the host remarked, “You wouldn’t recognise me from 10 years ago.”
Come to think of it, I thought, I’d like to think that I’ve evolved as well.
And just yesterday I was reminded of it.
I paused before sending a text – then deleted it.
The old me was a big believer in sharing her truth.
But that was not always constructive, particularly when writing or speaking from emotion.
And I learned the hard way the importance of restraint.
Particularly in business.
Restraint is an art form and a critical part of leadership, especially when accompanied by swift and informed decision making.
Now I don’t profess to have all the answers, but here’s what I’ve learned along the way.
I share these philosophies in the hope they simplify things for you today…..
- Something once said, can not be unsaid. There’s no place for emotion in business, and even passion needs to be tempered with an element of discipline to ensure basic business disciplines are in place. I see plenty of passionate women pursuing their calling in the practice of wellbeing and community, but we have to be aware and understand the politics and parameters in the world we work in, to be heard and elevated. This means knowing where and when to speak up and to sit down. Sometimes timing and placement is the difference between your message being heard or dismissed.
- The practice of restraint is just that – a practice.
I have learned to call it in.
I have found it useful to deliberately switch off, wind down and pursue rest and creativity.
And while I don’t always master it, I practice the power of pause – to try and think before I speak, as I’m a heart on my sleeve kind of girl.
And this practice even extends to habits and rituals. I’ve included adaptogens in my diet to help with clarity and calm. (If you’re interested, you can learn more about that here… or you can book in a call with me to discuss)
- Restraint is a powerful precursor to action. The best leaders I’ve observed made a habit of pausing, reflecting, gathering information and then deciding. It’s critical that restraint does not become submissive to the point of inactivity. Instead it’s the precursor to action at a predetermined time.
My challenge, if you’re reacting rather than responding to life is to pause. Collect your thoughts, create space, remember to be and stay creative. It helps you get and stay in flow…..then take decisive action.
Please share with someone who might need this today.
I’ve entered some powerful collaborations with wonderful women all over the world on the subjects of resilience, wellness, leadership and wealth. So stay tuned to links from me in the coming months.
“Deep Work – Rules for Focussed Success in a Distracted World”, by Cal Newport.
This is a great reminder of the need to time-block to go deep and to be and cultivate your inner genius. If you’re finding yourself flitting from task to task and feeling exhausted getting no-where this might be one for you. https://www.calnewport.com/books/deep-work/
Listen to it, read it, absorb it and teach it.
Avoid the temptation to be a sponge without ringing out what you know.
It is in the teaching that you learn it and embed it. I encourage you to tweak this in your life if you haven’t already done so. Listen, record it, consider your own take on it and then share it. It’s a game changer.
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